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Scorpio condoms come in two editions, basic black and the stealthy
invisible model. Both leather and studs are optional. Also, because
propriety concerns Scorpio, each package of Scorpio condoms
comes with a pre-printed, pre-coital agreement. Symbolized by the
venomous Scorpion, when you really want to sting your lover, you
want a Scorpio condom.

~~~

Sagittarians are known for their worldly pursuits, gamesmanship,
cosmopolitan attitude and knack for doing things in a big way.
Sagittarian condoms are the sportier models. They come equipped
with travel cases.

Sagittarian condoms are the ones that go with you and grow with
you. They promise a lot and they are extra thick to protect against
fluids of a dubious nature. The archer symbolizes Sagittarius.
When you want to be on target with Cupid's arrows, you want
a Sagittarius condom.

~~~

Capricorns are known for their longevity, wisdom, practicality,
ambition and earthy sensuality. Capricorns tend to be on the
conservative side. Capricorn condoms are the most durable,
having the longest shelf life. Capricorn condoms are extra
strong to last extra long.

With Capricorn condoms, wing tips, pin stripes and brief cases
are optional. Be sure to shake them out from time to time,
otherwise they go stale. Capricorn is the sign of the mountain
goat. When you're horny enough to climb the mountains of
love, you want a Capricorn condom.

~~~

Aquarians are gregarious, yet aloof. Aquarius is a high energy sign,
and one that is usually politically correct. Aquarian condoms are
just a little bit kinky. They come colored hot pink and electric blue,
and they come with a battery pack to light up in the dark and French
ticklers for extra stimulation.

With Aquarius condoms, the packaging features political slogans such as
the MiXXe Maxim, "Things can change overnight; it depends upon how late
you stay up and with whom doing what." Since Aquarius is a social sign,
Aquarian condoms come in multi-packs and are detachable to share with
your friends. Aquarius is the sign of the water bearer.When your love
juices really get to flowing, you want an Aquarius condom.

~~~

Pisces is known for their deep feelings that somewhat border on
mysticism.Pisces are idealistic, sometimes to the point of ecstatic
bliss. Pisces condoms are truly extra sensitive and translucent. Little
spikes are optional on the inside.

Pisces condoms contain special instructions for erotic fantasy games.
Pisces is the sign of the fishes. When it smells like love and you're on
a seafood diet, you want a Pisces condom.

~~~

Aries is the first sign of the zodiac. Aries are action oriented people.
Aries is symbolized by the ram, so naturally Aries condoms are made from
the finest lambskin. Because Aries often exhibits a "get up and go"
attitude, Aries condoms are steel belted, feature racing stripes, and
every fully equipped sports car dispenses them. Onyx packaging is
optional for the black sheep. Aries prides themselves on being first and
best. Aries condoms are perfect for quickies. When you want what you
want when you want it, you want an Aries condom.

~~~~~

Taurus is perhaps the most sensual and economy minded of the
astrological signs. Taurus condoms are made from the most luxurious
materials with special models available in silk and velvet. Taurus
condoms give you quality at an affordable price, and they're frequently
on sale.

Taurians may be slow to make their minds, but once they've made a
decision, they're almost impossible to stop. When your love is a sure
thing, you want a Taurus condom. The bull symbolizes Taurus. Taurus
condoms are the ones you want when you're really horny.

~~~

Geminis are known for their versatility, intellect and communications
skills.Accordingly, Gemini condoms accommodate a variety of sexual
positions and combinations. Gemini condoms are sold in multi-packs and
come with a
special audio chip. Naturally, they're available through mail order.

Frequently, Gemini condoms sell two for the price of one. They always
come in special pop up dispensers so that you don't have to work too
hard.Gemini is the sign of the twins and Gemini condoms come in twin
packs and are the preferred model for double headers. When you need to
do it more than once, you need Gemini condoms.

~~~

Cancer is a water sign and as such is very much interested in safety and
tradition. Therefore, Cancer condoms are waterproof and heat treated for
hot tubs and natural springs. Cancer condoms make you feel secure.
Cancer is also the sign of motherhood. With Cancer condoms, if you
decide to become a parent, you can always return the unused portion for
a partial refund. Cancer condoms are clingy. Never has history know a
time when Cancer condoms were not available. Fine antique specimens
grace many collections.

Astrologically speaking, Cancer is associated with the breasts. The
makers of Cancer condoms are happy to sponsor the annual spring
"Breast Worship Rituals." Cancer condoms are freely dispensed to
beautiful, large breasted women. Cancer is symbolized by the crab.
When you're not getting enough love and are starting to feel crabby,
reach for an Cancer condom.

~~~

Leos are known for their passion, pride, and (pro)creative urges.
Leos tend to be a bit flashy, showy and original in and out of bed.
Leo condoms come in gold foil packaging with custom monogramming. Leo
condoms come in one size: extra, extra large. Leo is symbolized by the
lion. When you're ready to meet your mate and make wild jungle noises,
you're ready for a Leo condom.

~~~

Virgos are fussy and particular. Virgo condoms feature perfection of fit
and they keep you neat and clear. Virgo tend to be environmentally sound
consumer types. Naturally, Virgo condoms have the lowest failure rate,
the highest performance rating and come equipped with a detailed, all
purpose instruction manual.

Virgo is symbolized by the virgin. When you're ready for some ritualized
defloration activities, you're ready for a Virgo condom.

~~~

Libras are suave and anxious to please others. Libra condoms are the
fancy European models and come in fashionable hand- painted designer
packaging.Libra condoms make for an elegant accessory on the best dates.
Libra condoms are aesthetically pleasing to both partners. They are
reversible and can turn into a diaphragm thus sharing the
responsibilities. Libra is symbolized by the scales. When sex weighs
heavily on your mind, you want a Libra condom.

~~~

I guess, some of it could be true

~~~
Scorpio (and its ruling planet, Pluto) is the traditional ruler of the eighth house of desire, determination, persistence, sex drive, motivation, beginnings and endings, and completion or culmination of actions.
~~~
(Scorpio Influence) One would describe most of your desires as extremely concentrated and intense. Sex is probably your strongest motivational drive. Once you develop an emotional interest in someone, you are inclined to persist in your pursuit until you are either totally accepted or totally rejected. You can be really turned on sexually by rubbing or friction applied to your body. Your inner motivations and desires are much more deeply seated than most others realize. You usually possess the tenacity and drive to get exactly what you want. It is true that when you really make up your mind to do something, about the only thing that anyone else can do is to "hide and watch." You tend to demand more of yourself than others expect of you, since you usually possess the tenacity and drive to get what you desire deeply. Vindictiveness toward love partners is a characteristic of your nature which you have to work to control. As a matter of fact, you may be a bit more oriented toward self-destructiveness than others. Once you decide to terminate a relationship, your intent is to end it then and there -- and finally. It is highly probable that you have an intense curiosity to investigate some areas of "occult" and "offbeat" sexual customs.

Now... please go do Jiggly... I mean Capricorn!

Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!"

Taurus: "I'm hungry--pass the pizza."

Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"

Cancer: "When are we getting married?"

Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?"

Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets."

Libra: "I liked it if you liked it."

Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you."

Sagittarius: "Don't call me--I'll call you."

Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"

Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"

Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?"

Well ok,has been done in the past